I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
