This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As far as classy things to do in front of your ex go, throwing up on your own shirt is not one of them.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I'm stranded in the Hampton area. Looks like I'm going to have to take one for the team and pass out by this applebees.
Come down. You're the next contestant on this bowl.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
So. My mom went grocery shopping for me while I was at work & brought the food here. Cool bc my dildo was laying on the counter. Forgot I left it out. I am sure she saw. Im mortified.
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