I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I just watched her pee in a trashcan, im still probably going to fuck her, what does that say about my standards
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
