I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Left my ID again and at a Giant's game. This is the second time they accepted my handgun safety certificate as proof of ID to buy beer.
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
she just came into my room, drunkenly shoved six dollars into my bra and told me to spend it on chicken wings.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
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