I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
Dude it's 6 am and you just invited me to a hotel with a shit ton of coke. Best morning ever
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
