I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I owe you a thank you for last night. Only you could go up to a guy, ask if he likes my boobs, and return later to find us in a full on dance floor makeout sesh. Well played.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
