the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
