do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
She told me that when she orgasms she just lays there like that baby from teenmom. Who the fuck says that
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
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We're pregaming our midterms. Also, when we get our tests back, we're taking a shot for every point we lost. If you're not in, you should just go ahead and transfer.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
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He called my boobs fluffy. Part sexy part pilsbury dough boy. Part sexy pilsbury dough boy. I'm so confused. And flattered?
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
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