Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
How many times can I tell him that I wasn't expecting sex before he finally figures out that I'm just too lazy to shave?
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
You know how the doctor said I need to stop being vegan unless I find a way to get more protein? There's protein in beer. The doctor wants me to drink more beer.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
He always takes me to get taco bell after we hook up in his car. It's sort of become a booty call tradition.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
