I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
Ladies don't puke and tell
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
