at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
Managed to discreetly puke out of a moving streetcar window, in front of no less than a dozen people. Nobody saw/said anything. I feel like a legit local now.
This is great- I found hangover detoxifying bath salt online. It flushes out the alcohol. We need this.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize
