Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
her roommates boyfriend drunkenly walked in on us banging and said yeeeeaaaaaahhhh and tried to high five me
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Wtf man. I knew she was bad news. No sane person cares if you eat their raviolli.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
He's going to wonder why I have burn marks on my asshole
When my beach tent arrives , I strongly suggest quitting our jobs and becoming homeless beach drunks
Drunk version of me is like a sleeping demon inside of me that awakes to the sound of vodka
I could see the visible disappointment when she saw my penis
Randomize
