you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
When we left, you were on your third beer. When we came back to grab you, you had a pint glass half full of whiskey and had convinced the band to give you a microphone.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
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