thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
so im kinda of nervous about the whole bust inside event last night
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Is asking my 8-year-old brother if he will make us shot glasses in his ceramics class too far?
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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