Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
You know ure stoned when u start thinking about making a bacon smoothie
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
yeah, you could tell they werent used to the strange things that i say. they were all outright shocked when i told one guy i hoped someone kidnapped him and stretched his dickhole over a fire hydrant
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
Randomize