Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
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