So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
3am cut off hipster s***'s afro on porch. Opened champagne. Felt like delilah cutting off samson's hair. Then shower & anal. So I guess his powers are intact.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Oh and he asked if I would occasionally still blow him if we had children. It was so romantic.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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