do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Update from family reunion: my aunt Janet once got her legs stuck behind her head. The fire department had to be called.
With sake I got over my irrational fear of seafood. Now I just fear sake.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
Just found out he cheated on me last night. But its Shark Week so I will deal with it next week.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Ita all starting to make sense i need vodka like i need air
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
watched my neighbor eat five yodels, mow his lawn, and then cry on his porch after the party... what did you give him?
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
A dozen naked frat boys in squirrel masks just ran by. Welcome to the official start of the holidays.
Randomize
