I wanna blow your doors off so bad right now.
Doors?
Rock your world. Blow you out. Skeet skeet.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You knocked on your freshman year room door, told the kids who opened it "I own you", and attempted to force-feed them everclear.
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize