In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I just found glitter on my vibrator... whatever we're doing has to stop
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
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