Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
It's not a funeral, it's a celebration of life. Going commando AND braless is really just honoring him!
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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