you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
This is ridiculous. I’m in fucking college getting high off a potato.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
Randomize
