I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I'm never drinking again. I saw way more penises than I ever cared to see last night. And I've decided that I'm going to live in Scotland.
I need an explanation for both of these epiphanies.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
I am stoned, not wearing a bra, and a woman. There is no way in fuck I am getting on a fucking bus.
I just started talking about how noodles were so good
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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