Texts From Last Night

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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?

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  (612): I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big? http://tfl.nu/wlg7
  Replies (109) Good night (1434) Bad night (14963)
• Favorite

  (936): View more from Texas

  Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow.

  (1-936): View more from Texas

  Can I eat your pillow?

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  (936): Dude, I woke up in the kitchen, naked, with a blueberry bagel as a pillow. (1-936): Can I eat your pillow? http://tfl.nu/ozwu
  Replies (7) Good night (5483) Bad night (754)
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  What are you drinking?

  (404): View more from Georgia

  Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL

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  (678): What are you drinking? (404): Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL http://tfl.nu/iqly
  Replies (54) Good night (1733) Bad night (2764)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.

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  (410): He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school. http://tfl.nu/iqns
  Replies (20) Good night (971) Bad night (5841)
• Favorite

  (858): View more from California

  Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it

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  (858): Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it http://tfl.nu/r7l5
  Replies (16) Good night (5488) Bad night (1150)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.

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  (304): it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears. http://tfl.nu/ziqy
  Replies (31) Good night (8728) Bad night (1909)
• Favorite

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve

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  (732): Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve http://tfl.nu/de13
  Replies (4) Good night (4567) Bad night (920)
• Favorite

  (843): View more from South Carolina

  GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.

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  (843): GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head. http://tfl.nu/4n4o
  Replies (8) Good night (3045) Bad night (1092)
• Favorite

  (305): View more from Florida

  We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.

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  (305): We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail. http://tfl.nu/cojn
  Replies (9) Good night (3170) Bad night (902)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.

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  (513): Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude. http://tfl.nu/aac3
  Replies (6) Good night (2607) Bad night (747)
• Favorite

  (225): View more from Louisiana

  I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.

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  (225): I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with. http://tfl.nu/2qkg
  Replies (4) Good night (933) Bad night (482)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...

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  (612): He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard... http://tfl.nu/5xwe
  Replies (8) Good night (663) Bad night (1052)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.

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  (269): Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair. http://tfl.nu/xxq4
  Replies (0) Good night (725) Bad night (385)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time.

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  (248): I should not be allowed to be in possession of a fifth and a phone at the same time. http://tfl.nu/ekvp
  Replies (1) Good night (452) Bad night (201)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.

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  (248): You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new. http://tfl.nu/nx9b
  Replies (0) Good night (316) Bad night (357)

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