We had sex on the first date...do you think he thinks I'm a whore?
Yes and so do I
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
he stole me 6 pairs of frilly undies and proclaimed "your ass looks like a 5 in those. it'll be a 10 in these bad boys". every girl needs a gay bff.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
It’s A Miracle These 21 Promiscuous People Don’t Have STDs
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
These 27 Infuriatingly Annoying Habits Will Ruin Your Day
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Well on the plus side I have started adding benefiber to my bottle of wine
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.