Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
So apparently when I roll on X I find 'dick ina box' not only hilarious but also sexually arousing.
your mascara is on the toilet seat from when you fell asleep last night
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I dare you try and top an Eiffel tower full of Margarita
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Two words: blizzard sex
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
