I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
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