Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He stumbled in drunk at 7am, while we were getting ready for work. He poured a bowl of Cap'n Crunch, poured Jack Daniels on it., and said he was having "Captain Jack" for breakfast. I don't know how he's alive and employed. I hope the Cap'n calls in sick for him today.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
i believe in u and ur pee
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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