Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
My co-worker just asked me if i colored my hair. Time to take a shower.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
I'm flagged. Drank strippers water. Flashed Dave tryin to get a job here. You order the shots. Green tea betch.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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