i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
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