VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
The last thing I remember is sitting in a chair and him hand feeding me bell peppers
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Randomize
