im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
25 likes of a picture on Instagram of my butthole. beat that.
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
I'm stuck in a tree and request your assistance ASAP
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she cant stop having the shits.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
