I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
you know, even black out drunk I can always remember the exact point where I should have stopped drinking.
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I had phone sex with a retiree last night. This is not how I envisioned my 20s going...
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Eating chips and sending nudes. This is my life.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Randomize
