Kiss
Puke
But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I had lunch with him today and quietly mourned his wasted good looks on such a disappointing set of genitals.
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
ALL I WANT FOR CHRISTMAS IS FOR YOU TO SHUT THE FUCK UP FOR ONCE
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
