I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
Yeah the last text says "How many your ass,,,,, prepare it" so take that for what it is
last night i fell off a barstool and busted my nose. i can regretfully say that i didn't see cherub last night.
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
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