Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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