I couldnt find her vag and just started laughing uncontrollably. She was not pleased. Neither was i.
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
The Domino's delivery guy is in front of me at The Wendy's drive-through. Hmmm.....
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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