His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
So the bar isnt gonna put that broken window on my tab. appaerently they want cash
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
when life gives you lemons, puke and rally.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
Randomize
