yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
I don't deserve a penis
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
yep, just sat in the backseat of my car for about five minutes looking for the vodka soaked underwear,when i came to the realization that i really gotta start getting my shit together..
I got dominos and had to stop whilst eating and take a moment of silence for how good it was
I regret nothing
Not even Married Dan?
I regret one thing
Randomize