Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
so i decided to listen to you and went ahead and slept with him. you owe me 3 minutes
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
