i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
He kept telling me that something was trying to enter this dimension from another universe through his spine...
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
I just dropped a condom on the floor at costco in front of my girlfriend and her husband. Today is not going to go well.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
well that was a fail
maybe for you, but i got a free ice cube in my bra
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