My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
i wonder if she has dreads down there too...
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
All I know is that I woke up with glitter all over me and blood on my shoes. It wasn't my blood.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
Randomize
