I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
The bartender charged us for drinks. Life is different.
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
The picture on Facebook I was just tagged in, with the mask, that is the definition of Carmen, my drunk alter ego
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Randomize
