Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
im at a bar with my dad last night and he got hit on more that I did
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
He left me a five minute voicemail apologizing for chasing me with a meat beater. I'm actually not sure what that means.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
So now I can cross "have my ass be someone's phone background" off the bucket list. You know, if it was something I actually had wanted to happen.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
Randomize
