I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
You can cross "give someone a blow job while playing Colors of the Wind" off my bucket list.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
how do you casually eat pancakes with someone after they send you an unsolicited dick pic?
you don't. it's the point of no return for pancake enjoyment.
I just had a spiritual connection with my sweater and did ballet in the hallway. Alone. I'd say we're gonna chalk that up as a win for marijuana and call it a night
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
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