ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
He gets married Father's Day weekend and I just found out I'm pregnant. What do I do?
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
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