She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
