A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
