Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
And now that i don't feel so bad because you're not pregnant the $15 for the pregnancy test I bought would be appreciated
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
