So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
He whinnies like a horse when he's cumming. I wish I would have known this before we got into a relationship.
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Quick question: is it impolite to pause sex to put on my knee brace?
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
Randomize
