You're never going to guess who I just worked out next to..
Who?
Chris brown
No way... I bet he was intense
Are you kidding? He was prob training for round two
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
question: does your pee smell like mojitos at all?
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
We celebrated our relationship by shotgunning beers on his lawn in our underwear. I may have to marry this man...
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
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